Put This In Your Face Cavity.

The one below your nose. You know you want to.

What is it, you ask? It is a Taco Bell Grilled Stuffed burrito, that has been inserted inside a sausage, stuffed with more cheese, then wrapped in bacon. Because as Jesus once said, “It doesn’t matter what the fuck it is, wrap that shit in bacon.” Except he said it in Aramaic, and it sounds way cooler like that.

Vegetarians saw this monster and reconsidered. I showed it to a vegan and her head exploded. But, I’m thinking that this is one of those ‘looks like a better idea than it actually is’ type of things. I don’t know what the intent of the chef was, but hopefully this was not meant for one person to consume. Because, while it looks delicious, I’m sure if you ate that whole thing you would feel pretty bad.

“I like the way the sausage makes my arteries constrict.”

Like, if you ate this, you don’t love yourself, or something. Or maybe you love yourself too much. Or maybe you’re taking pictures of yourself eating this and sending them to your mother, as a way to make her show more felling and affection towards you. And, like, that doesn’t work? So, you send her pictures of you eating this, while shooting heroin,

With Ke$ha,

While skydiving,

Into Detroit.

And your Mom is still all, “That’s nice, James.” (Your name is James) Your mom, what a cold-hearted bitch.

Eat the sausage.

One Response to “Put This In Your Face Cavity.”

  1. That’s nice, Jesus.

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