I now pronounce you man and unappealing dessert.

There are things that are more ridiculous than this. Lots, probably. I’m no Professor of the Absurd over here, and I’m sure some of you could give me some great examples of things that are more out there than this ‘dress’. But really? Nobody should have done this. Not only is it impractical, uncomfortable, and a bait-ball, ( “It’s the happiest day of my life! I’m being eaten alive by ants!”) it’s also just really weird and un-attractive. Does anybody else here think it looks like she has a trowel sticking out of her side like some kind of weird cement mixer?

“That’s hot”—Hannibal Lecter

Also, when you look at the missing piece, it kind of looks like there is a growing wound, like the bride is being exposed and eaten away. And why is the cake that color? What the hell? If you want to tell your soon-to-be husband that he needs to do some south side tongue work at the consummation bash, there are more subtle ways to do it.

This is a very strange marriage ritual. These people must be from Ontario.

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