‘Hub City State Of Mind’ is complete and utter trash.

Ugh. And when I say ugh, I mean it in the most scathing possible connotation. I’m not from Hagerstown. As to living in Hagerstown, well, I ain’t admitting to shit.  But here is the point, ‘Empire State of Mind’ is a beautiful song. The Jay-Z version is good, (I’m not into that sort of thing, but I know good when I hear it) and the Alicia Keys version is better. But a good song is not exempt from parody. In fact, most of the really interesting/funny parodies are of decent songs. That’s fine. Do your worst. But, can we stop on this one, please? You guys are beating it to death! Can’t you tell when it’s had enough?

Do it again!

Steven Colbert did the best one, with the bona-fide Alicia Keys. That one was funny, and I think it might have started the whole thing. Here’s the link in case you haven’t seen it:


But now it is time to stop. In fact, it was time to stop before this. Because this happened, and now this is a real thing that exists and we can’t shove it back down in the Morlock hole from whence it came ‘cause now it’s out and in the open eating up all my happiness.


What the fuck is that? That is awful. It’s not even a true parody. Parodies are usually comedic, this one is actually trying to promote Hagerstown. You guys remember our music teacher, right? The one with all the pills in her drawer? This is like some kind of half-baked assignment from her. Okay class, I want you to make up a song based on this very popular and well-written piece. But, even though this town is a sewer, don’t be negative, go out and rep your hood. And if anybody can tell me why the gym teacher never calls me back, you get fifteen extra credit points.”

These folks took that assignment and ran with it. They shouldn’t have, but they did. What’s the worst part? They missed several opportunities to be genuinely funny. Hagerstown is one big rotting joke. It’s a fucking prison town, for god’s sake! It’s full of crack-heads! The ammunition is there, people! God, you guys dropped the ball on this one.

Back the fuck up, amateur.

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