People Who Should Not Be Having Sex

In this feature, I will showcase individuals who should really not be having any kind of sex. Ever. At all.

We’re going to have to start the day off on a sad note. I’m sorry about that. Maybe it’s just me feeling cynical at the start of the workweek. Maybe it’s the heroin. I dunno.

“Sounds like somebody has a case of the Mondays”—Nina.

“BOOM”—Smith & Wesson.

But seriously, check out that fucking question, will you? I admit, could be we’re being trolled here. The answer is trolling without question. Or, it could be somebody who is just curious asking a very stupid question that is unrelated to them, but sadly, I don’t think so.

No, I think that there is really some idiotic 2nd trimester teen out there that thinks that little Kei$ha Underwood Smith is going to emerge from the Smith love canal knocked-up. She probably thinks that every time a penis goes in there the kid is playing whack-a-mole. And that is just sad, you guys. Keep your little sister off the streets, for god’s sake.

One Response to “People Who Should Not Be Having Sex”

  1. oh dear god in heaven I’m dead from rupturing all my internal organs laughing

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